The Grand Lido Visitors Hangout

Lois and I had been planning this trip to GLB since late September 2003. We planned on using this vacation to celebrate our 30^th wedding anniversary and, needless to say, we wanted things to be as close to perfect as possible. We thought adequate planning would help. Not everything went as expected, they very seldom do, but we were determined to go with the flow. Here are some thoughts on our week at GLB.

GETTING THERE (Air) – After all the planning, we found out just a few weeks before leaving, and while I was out of town on a business trip, that our travel agent had us book out of Norfolk VA, on a flight that didn’t exist, headed North to Philadelphia. After what would have been about an hour or so delay for the connection to MBJ, we would get back on another plane and fly directly over Norfolk to start our vacation. We didn’t plan on spending our first day of vacation in airports or airplanes. After much noise, we finally got it partially straightened out and was able to connect in Charlotte NC instead. We arrived at MBJ with little inconvenience.

GETTING THERE (Land) – About a week before leaving I started to see some traffic on The Hangout about the new Super Clubs Arrival Lounge and Lidosine. I called the 1-800-GO SUPER number and spoke with Cindy, who collected information about my room class, arrival date and time and expected departure. She assured me we had reservations for the Lidosine in both directions. Upon arriving at MBJ, Lois and I proceeded to the Super Clubs Arrival Lounge and checked in at the front desk. When asked about ground transportation and the Lidosine, the young lady at the desk told me that unfortunately the Lidosine wasn’t running that day (Saturday the 19^th) and other transportation would be made available. (We later found out from other GLB guests that the Lidosine doesn’t run on Wednesdays, Thursdays or Fridays either. I think we should rename the Lidosine to Big Foot – long rumored to exist, some fuzzy pictures passed around, but nobody has actually ridden in it). Okay, not a problem. Remembering the traffic on The Hangout, I asked where we could get our welcoming glass of Champagne. The response was that it wasn’t usually served there, but she would see what she could do. I told her never mind, we’ll just wait for the bus. We were eventually crammed into a small van. I was lucky enough to be given one of the fold down seats (if you have ever ridden in a C-130 web seat (I have), you would have been more comfortable) that jammed into Lois’ legs if I sat on it. I spent the next 45 minutes half-sitting, half-standing and holding the back of the seat away from Lois’ knees. After a short stop at Starfish we arrived at GLB, none the worse for the wear.

RECEPTION – Here things finally started to go smoothly. We were met with a refreshing drink and a cool towel. Check-in process took about five minutes and we were off to our room.

ACCOMODATIONS – We were given room 3025, a one bedroom suit on the third floor with a beautiful view of the beach. We quickly started to unpack and checked out the room. Having never been to GLB before we really didn’t know what to expect, but we had been to COR and expected similar niceties. I offered to make Lois a drink while she finished putting some final items in the drawers, and headed for the small refrigerator. Imagine my surprise to find there was no liquor there. Like I said, our only comparison was COR, but they provided in their suites pint bottles of gin, vodka, rum, two kinds of beer and several mixers. I expected the same. Knowing there’s a bar downstairs we headed for the pool. After ordering a couple drinks we oriented ourselves to our new surroundings and got comfortable.

DINING – We pre-arranged dinner that evening at Piacere. After a couple of hours at the pool, we cleaned up, dressed and headed to dinner. Everything was finally perfect - the service attentive, the food flavorful and the surroundings elegant. We ate at Piacere only one more time during our visit, coming away as satisfied at the first time. We also ate at Munasan once during our visit. It was good, but we’ve both had better Japanese meals elsewhere. It was almost like they were afraid to use spices during the preparation. We ate a couple of lunches at Nanny’s and found it very good. The Beach Dinner and Jamaica Street Party provided ample amounts of good food. Although, something at the Beach Party made Lois very ill and she spent the rest of the evening in the bathroom. Our other dinners, however, were not as good.

DINING (Other) – Other than room service or eating the continental spread at the Au Naturel Clubhouse, the only choice for breakfast is the Victoria Market. I don’t understand how this much food could have no flavor at all. Most of the fruit was so tasteless I thought I could just as well be eating straw (Nadine had good fruit). The only flavor given to the eggs came from the butter they were cooked in. The ham, bacon and sausage were totally nondescript. Service was (I’ll be kind) pathetic. We sat at our table for nearly twenty minutes with dirty dishes, empty water and juice glasses, no coffee or tea and the staff appeared to purposely look away, rather than ask if there was anything else needed. I’ve gotten better service at Denny’s. By the third morning I got in the habit of just getting our own drink refills. While this got me some nasty looks, it did not get us any attention at our table. Once Lois asked for a Bloody Mary and was told the bartender hasn’t arrived yet, but (heavy sigh and rolled eyes) the server would see what he could do. Dinner was no better. We tried twice and found the meals to be lacking any taste whatsoever. La Pasta was no better. The food lacked any distinctive flavor (certainly, it wasn’t Italian) and we sat for twenty five minutes nursing a glass of water waiting for our order to be taken before I finally got up from the table and went to get a waitress.

ROOM SERVICE – Outstanding. ‘Nuff said.

ENTERTAINMENT – The staff did a great job trying to keep everyone entertained. Their participation helped quite a bit and ensured the guests were always involved. Perhaps a 10:30 p.m. start time for some of the parties is a bit late. Several people I spoke with were beat by that time, after participating in a full day of swimming, golf, tennis, volleyball, etc. Most people sneak out around 11:30 anyway to hit the hot tub. Maybe start a half an hour earlier?

FACILITIES – Overall, GLB is great. I recognize every facility of that size has some problems. Maintaining two pools, hot tubs, tennis courts, water craft, dive equipment, a golf course, fitness center, spa, restaurants and grounds is a daunting task. I would recommend, however, that more attention be paid to the bar areas. On a number of occasions we used the piano bar, disco and club house and a few times each of them smelled like rotting trash. At one point we HAD to leave the piano bar.

AU NATUREL – Please explore the possibility of keeping the bar open in the clubhouse 24 hours. When this facility is closed, the only place to get a drink is from room service (without walking all the way to the beach house on the other end of the resort). When room service is over tasked, like during breakfast prep times, it can take up to 45 minutes to get a bottle of champagne or mixed drink. Was it the resort’s intention for room service to act as 24 hour bartender? If so, waiting this long for a drink is unreasonable.

STAFF – Certainly, there are notables. They’re the same names you hear all the time. That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be recognized, but it does mean there are others on the staff who might want to work just a little harder. Lois and I would personally like to recognize and thank Audry, Ingrid, Wayne, Merl, Nadine, Septon, Michael, Zanesha and Tameka. Please forgive me if I’ve misspelled anyone’s name. We’d also like to thank the maid staff. They were completely invisible during our stay, but our room was always clean and well maintained. If I had their names, I’d mention them as well.

OTHER VACATIONERS – As with any vacation, this one was what we made of it. I’ve seen on The Hangout several questions about the people who’ve been to GLB and who newcomers could expect to meet, what they’re like and what to expect from them. The answers always come back that great friendships are launched and others made the GLB experience richer and more worthwhile. I’d like to take this opportunity to say thanks to: Jim and Susan – Those of you who haven’t met them are truly missing something. Jim is a gentleman of high regard and Susan is a Southern beauty of charm and elegance. We hope you find a wine you like. Mick and Karen – Two of the most pleasant people you’d ever want to meet. Both of them are great companions at either dinner or disco. It’s not a party if they’re not there. Robert and Susan – Refined folks who go way out of their way to make you comfortable. Sitting over drinks or dinner, they make the evening worthwhile. Ellen and Byron – Southern, genteel and charming. Next pool party we have, you’re invited. Are you still tying $20 bow ties? Aréanne and Randy – You guys party like it’s supposed to be done. Thanks for letting us in. Aaron and Tiffany – This couple are some of the nicest people you’d want to meet. They are exactly what you’d want your children to grow up to be; bright, friendly, outgoing. We wish them the best of luck. The list goes on and on, but this report is already too long. Thanks to everyone who made us feel welcome and offered your friendship.

SUMMARY – Some of you will feel I’ve been way too critical. I simply see some things that might need improvement and hope to bring it to management’s attention. For others, I hope to make you aware that not everything will be perfect and it’s best to expect some glitches, but shake the problems off and continue the best way you can. Will we return? You bet! After traveling all around the world, we haven’t found anyplace that offers the services and environment of GLB. Thanks and see you again soon.